We should not expect otherwise. Only a fool expects figs in winter.
People do what they do. And yet here you are, surprised. That a boxer who bit or gouged before, to borrow Marcus Aurelius' metaphor from Meditations, would do it again? That a scorpion, to borrow from Aesop, would sting the frog?
Only a fool, Epictetus said, would expect figs in winter. It is equally foolish, the Stoics remind us, to expect the wicked not to be wicked: not to do what they've done before, or not to do it to us. They told you with their past behaviour.
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We have to go through the world with our eyes open.
We have to be ready for what the day will likely bring us, and prepared for what people will do. That isn't to say we need to become cynical. But we have to stop fooling ourselves. We can't keep saying, “Oh, it will be different this time,” or “I'm sure it will be different for me.”
TRY THIS TODAY
Think of someone who keeps letting you down in the same way. Plan for them to do it again, and decide now how you'll respond calmly when they do.
Much of what I've learned about Stoicism comes from Ryan Holiday. Find more of his writing at dailystoic.com and ryanholiday.net.
While I have edited much of this content, there are some cases where I have taken Ryan Holiday's words directly. I've included them because I think they are powerful and will be helpful for you. They are also helpful for me, and I've put them here so I can learn and understand more myself.
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