Take the high road. You'll sleep better for it.
Frustrating, infuriating, thoughtless people provide opportunities. When someone is a jerk to you, it's a chance to practise virtue in how you respond: by not being a jerk back, by forgiving them, by standing up for yourself, by understanding what they're going through.
Of course, when someone is being difficult, you're tempted to give it right back. You're tempted to say, “Oh, this is how we're behaving these days?” or “This is what passes for acceptable behaviour?” But you shouldn't.
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The low road will always dog you.
If you take the high road, you can go to sleep feeling good about yourself. If you take the low road, you might be walking down the street ten years from now thinking, “Why did I have to be so cutting to that person?”
Marcus Aurelius says, “The best revenge is to not be like that.” He had no choice about what was done to him. Somebody else took the low road. But he could choose how he responded. He could choose the high road. He could choose not to be consumed by anger or desire, not to be infected, not to be implicated in their ugliness. He could choose to be the person he wanted to be.
Whenever someone does something to us, minor or major, we always have this choice. We can decide not to be like the people who did us wrong. We can choose to be better. We can choose the high road.
TRY THIS TODAY
The next time someone is rude to you, pause before you reply and ask: what would the person I want to be say here?
Much of what I've learned about Stoicism comes from Ryan Holiday. Find more of his writing at dailystoic.com and ryanholiday.net.
While I have edited much of this content, there are some cases where I have taken Ryan Holiday's words directly. I've included them because I think they are powerful and will be helpful for you. They are also helpful for me, and I've put them here so I can learn and understand more myself.
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